Romantic Relationships and Us

He slammed the car door so hard that the car shook. The driver’s window was half up and the window broke. Did you acknowledge as you read that he slammed the car door so hard that the car shook and window broke. Yet in the rage of his anger of this man he was surprised the car window broke. What happened?

Well, hours before Bob was on his mobile phone arguing with his wife. Bob was asking her why she left him with no money in the bank and no credit cards. The credit cards had all been reported stolen so accounts closed and new credit cards on the way. What made Bob angrier was that no house keys to get into the house were left for him. The locks had been changed during the day. What brings about such behavior ? Why would a loving relationship go bing then die! Well, what happened is that Pauline found photographs of her husband Bob and his lover, Paul !

Bob had been gay before he met Pauline. Pauline immediately fell in love with his beautiful hair, his gorgeous eyes, his personality, his sensitivity and his smile. Bob hid nothing and told Pauline IMMEDIATELY that he was gay and had just broken up with his lover of many years. Pauline insisted to Bob that they would just be friends at first. Pauline thought to herself that she would change Bob. That is probably the same thought that many of females and men have of someone they want to be a romantic partner. It’s always those dangerous words that come back to haunt us years later.
• oh it’s not a big deal, I can change that
• my love will be so great that
• just needs some understanding and religion in her or his life

Years later when those words came back to haunt Pauline it was painful. Pauline was hurt and could not accept that the ONLY person we can change is ourselves. We cannot change the world! We can contribute to the well being, we can offer suggestions, “we can lead a horse to water but we cannot make the horse drink the water.”  Pauline was hurt and she wanted to hurt back, Pauline was saying, actually shouting that she was hurt and wanted to hurt back with her actions.  What Pauline was not accepting is that Pauline was hurt because of Pauline. Pauline felt like a failure and embarrassed after she said to herself that she was going to change the ways of Bob.

In conclusion, we all want to be in a Romantic Relationship. We all want someone to come home to or wakeup with. However, we must remember to keep two feet on the ground when we get those feelings of “I’m so in love, you just don’t understand”. When love is pulling you up off your feet it’s up to you and you alone to keep those feet on the ground. If you really love someone you will accept that person as they are. You will not go into a relationship with the attitude of thinking you can change or adjust the life of the other person. Love is accepting the person and helping each other grow.